The proof is in the pudding!

Nick and I always go through the same things at the same time due to the fact that we’re married, parents together and on the same journey. The problems we encounter always hit both of us at the same time so you would think that we would both respond in the same way. Not so! Nick responds in his way and I respond in mine, and it’s got me thinking about the grid through which people see things. It is totally possible for two people to look at the same situation and see two totally different things because of the grid through which they view the world.

The way a person sees things is actually critical because it will have an impact on the way they react to the situation which in turn will have an impact on the outcome. So a person’s grid can determine the outcome... scarey!

We’ve all heard of the proverbial optimist being someone who sees the glass half full and the proverbial pessimist being someone who sees the glass as half empty. Same glass – two viewpoints. But what actually makes the optimist see the glass as being half full? In a book called “Learned Optimism”, Professor Matin Seligman says that when something bad happens to an optimist, they expect that the bad thing will be short-lived (temporary), that is was caused by an outside source (external) and that it only affects a partial area of their life (specific). When something bad happens to a pessimist, they expect it will go on forever (permanent), feel that the bad thing was caused by themselves (personal) and that is will affect their whole life (pervasive).

“When pessimistic people run into obstacles in the workplace, in relationships or on the sports field, they give up” says Martin. “When optimistic people run into obstacles, they try harder.”

Optimism is intricately connected with faith and pessimism is connected with fear. You can’t be a pessimist who is full of faith, or an optimist that is full of fear. Do you know that it’s proven that optimists catch fewer sicknesses, live longer and bounce back quicker than pessimists.

Seeing as I am a natural optimist (Thankyou Jesus!), I battle to see life from the point of view of a pessimist, but I’m starting to think that the key for pessimists is to fake it til you make it! The Bible says that the tongue is the rudder of your ship, so even if you don’t believe a word of what you’re saying, tell yourself (and those around you) that everything will be fine, things will get better, your situation is temporary and there are so many things in your life to be thankful for. Picture what you want the outcome to be and start to believe that it will be so. The Bible says that “Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” The actual translation is that faith is the “Title deed” for land you can not see! How cool is that! Can you see the land with your eyes– no. But if you can picture it with your mind’s eye and have the faith for it, then it is just as good as holding the title deed. The land is yours.

Joshua and Caleb were typical optimists because of their faith in their God. When they were sent into the promised land as spies to check whether they could beat the enemy and take over the land, what did they see with their real eyes – huge, scarey giants. But when they came back, they were the only two that said “Let’s go, we can take em!” Everyone else was terrified. Everybody saw the same thing but Joshua and Caleb’s response was different to everybody elses. Their response to a scarey situation was optimism based on faith which overflowed into their speech and in the end, they did beat the enemy and take the promised land.

I often marvel at how blessed I am. I can list so many things that I have to be grateful for. I wouldn’t swop my life for anybody else’s life and I’m so excited for what’s ahead. Even on a bad day, I know that I have gotten off light in life. I don’t have to look too far left or too far right to see that I am living in huge blessing! I don’t deserve it but I’m grateful for it and so conscious of the fact that every good and perfect thing in my life has come from one source – my God.